I know I am so blessed but sometimes life can be hard. I know of so many other people who have it way harder than me but it's still hard, at least to me. Sometimes I just get a bunch of "why" questions running through my head. I'm so grateful I have Talmage. He cheers me up and lightens my moods. I love him and Jacob. They are such blessings in my life.
But, I still ache for another baby. I find myself still counting the weeks that I would've been pregnant. I'd be showing and in the second trimester. I know I shouldn't think of these things but it's hard not too.
It's so hard for me. It took us 12 months to get pregnant and now I have to start all over again. And my "why" questions start...
Why can't I just be normal?
Why can't I be fertile?
Why can a teenager get pregnant their first time but it takes me a year?
Why did I lose my baby?
Why is everyone pregnant but me?
I guess General Conference is coming at the perfect for me!